What would you do if (for whatever reason) you had only one month to live?
Who would you spend your time with?
What would you tell your best friends?
Where could people find you?
Would you finally make that apology you'd been putting off?
Would you tell people you loved them?
Could you forgive those who have wronged you?
Would you embrace the time you did have or attempt to hide from your definitive mortality?
Last Sunday, my pastor began a sermon series based on the book "One Month to Live" by Kerry & Chris Shook. He encouraged us to live life for the Lord with no regrets. Don't say "oh, I'll go back to church when I get retire." Leave the idea of your "busy life" behind because God never has been and never will be too busy for you.
During the message, he challenged the congregation to make a list, a real, written list of what we would do if we had only one month to live.
A slight smile made its way across my face during the sermon because, for a brief moment, I felt almost normal. The idea of death has been floating in my head for years, and as I've told you before, other people think it's weird. (But if you ask me, I'm just prepared.) It worries my mother and made my dad roll his eyes during his cancer treatments. But all of the sudden I'm able to put on paper the things I would do. A bucket list, so to speak.
Now I'm sure this is where most people would want to skydive, mountain climb or take off on a cruise. But if you haven't figured it out yet, I'm not most people. Although I've never flown, the idea of soaring 35 thousand feet above the ground at 500 miles an hour scares me half to death. If a situation ever arises that I MUST hop on a plane, you'll find me crouched in the corner sucking my thumb and rocking back and forth in a semi-comatose state. As far as mountain climbing goes, I don't have the upper body strength or harness to take off up a mountain, and as for that cruise, 7 days stuck on a boat would leave me with sea sickness and three weeks instead of four. At least my math skills haven't failed yet.
*Disclaimer: for the record: I hope I don't perish anytime soon but if my time should come, you shouldn't worry about me and I'll see you on the other side.*
Now, on to the good stuff... A glimpse of what I would like to do should I have only one month to live. (I reserve the right to change this as I see fit, which could be daily.)
First, I would try my best to right the many, many wrongs accumulated throughout the course of my relatively short-lived life. I'd apologize to the ones I've let down along the way and give it my best attempt at making amends. A couple of people wouldn't give me the time of day, but you can't blame a girl for trying.
I'd also want to try to convey to those closest to me just how much I care for them. That L-word and I don't exactly get along and I'm not sure why. But my family and my best friends would have no doubt when it comes to the immense impact they have had on my life. They make me want to be a better person whether or not they realize it.
In conjunction with this, I'd have to spend more time with my grandparents. My grandfather is my Superman and due to his health, the family had to make the very hard decision of moving him into a rest home, so I don't see him every day like I do his wife. He is full of funny stories from his childhood and life lessons he's learned the hard way. Then there's my grandma. To say she's my hero is a complete understatement. Oh, and her cooking....MMMMM!!
Next, I'd have to have a little bit of fun with a little less seriousness. It involves private property, off road vehicles and a little bit of dirt. And in the words of Forrest Gump, "that's all I have to say about that."
And on a completely, possibly off the wall note (would you expect less from me?) I wanna drive a combine to work. Can't you just see my driving down a brick road in a new John Deere S690? It could possibly make it in Mayberry's weekly newspaper and the thrice daily local news on the radio. Doesn't that sound like a blast?!
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