Me Gusta Mexicano

I have no idea what that title actually translates to, but I'm hoping it's something along the lines of proclaiming my love of Mexican food.

Mayberry has a mexican restaurant. Well, technically there are two but in my opinion there is only one. It's called El Mexicano and I highly recommend the chicken chimichanga, fried ice cream, and their cheese sauce is ohhhh-emmm-gee GOOD!

You should try it. And tell them I sent ya.

Anywho, their food is great, and so is their service. For instance: today, my friend Megan and I patroness El Mexi for lunch (after all, where else can you eat for $6?). Our server today was Darrell, whom we love. He knows to bring out drinks in to go cups, as well as what drinks to fill those to go Cups with. His wife just has twins two weeks ago and they're adorable. We've seen the pictures. Until this moment I've never realized that might be a little odd, but I digress.

What I'm trying to say is that Mayberry's Mexican is unlike anybody else's.   They know you, they're friendly (especially on Tuesdays when domestics are a dollar), and in this small town when everybody knows everything, you can even catch some half-truths and possibly run into people you haven't seen in a while to catch up. 

So here's to my favorite Mexican restaurant.  The one where they know as soon as I walk in the door to bring me a Mt. Dew; they'll ask me how work is because they know I have a couple or three jobs;  and they know to put me in a booth, not a table.

Next time you're in Mayberry you should stop by.

My Best Friends Wedding: The Eve of the Eve

This coming weekend has been on my mind ever since the week after Valentine's Day.  Excitement has mounted, preparations made, dresses fitted, and the preacher is ready. 

Yep!  My best friend is GETTING MARRIED!!!

Today's work day was cut short for yours truly in order to make the four hour drive so I could partake in the wedding of the year.  I'll have a front row view of all the funny shenanigans, the tearful moments, and any last-minute mishaps.  Wait, not front row - I'll be right there trying to make everything run as smoothly as possible. 

Pictures will follow, but first I must help my bride-to-be bake and icing cookies tomorrow!

Who knew a wedding could be such a stressful, energetic, exciting time?  Never mind, if you've ever been involved in one, you already know.

Sisterly Love

Have I ever told you about my older sister?

That's her in the middle.

She's sophisticated.

And tall.

I call her Joe Bob and she enjoys the finer things in life, like good wine, high heels, nice makeup, shopping sprees at Nordstrom's, fast cars, and sushi.

Yours truly is more of a tomboy/walking contradiction who likes to get a little dirty and stir up a little dust in my four-wheel-drive while putting on my lipgloss.

The two of us don't have a lot in common, but we have thought of a few things: Green Bay football, cute shoes, DNA, baking, demolition derbies, KY basketball, and of course - sushi.

She turned me on to it last year when our other sis and I were in town (she lives 3 hours away in the most awesome city on the planet) and now I wish Mayberry had a sushi joint.  And lemme tell ya - this place was SO DELICIOUS!! It's my favorite since I'm now a sushi connoisseur and all.

Speaking of which, that brings us to today's example of how much we love and respect each other.

You see, we really admire and love one another in our own twisted way.

Someday maybe we'll even open up a sushi joint.

Or not.

Appreciation the small stuff

For my entire life, Mayberry has held a special place in my heart.  It's seen my best, witnessed my worst, kept me grounded, and helped teach me some of life's most important lessons.

If you're not from a small town, there are some things you have been deprived of:

For instance, where else can you walk into a restaurant during the busy lunch hour and the waitress knows exactly what you want before you sit down?

In towns like this ...
- You wave to just about every vehicle you pass, because you know them, are related to them, or used to date one of their relatives

- You can, while on your morning 3 mile walk, pass the doughnut shop and decide to eat one. However, you don't have your wallet and the owner tells you to take it and bring by cash before you go to work, which is a block away.

- When a fire truck is around your neighborhood with its lights on, you WILL receive phone calls wanting I make sure that you and your grandma's cookbook are ok.

- Instead of pulling you over, a cop might call your cell phone to tell you to slow down. Or, better yet- he'll call your dad. (That will scare the crap out of any sixteen year old!)

- You will see people driving to a rural restaurant on their 4-wheelers or UTVs. Technically, I think it's illegal, but people do what people do.

- If there's been a death in your family, people will show up within hours to mow your yard, feed you broccoli casserole, water your flowers an take out your trash. Why? Because they know you have more important things to deal with and they've been there too.


All that is just more reason for me to love this town, but more importantly, appreciate the people who have molded me into the person I am today.

Wherever I may end up, I know this town will always be in my heart.

Good Wittle Wabbits

Remember those rabbits my John Deere met?

Oh, those poor creatures didn't stand  a chance.

Please ignore the current condition of my lawn and take a moment to remember those lost to the wrath of my 42 inch deck.

But there is a happy-ish ending to the story!  The momma rabbit came back for the little bunnies!

Finally I did something semi-correct!

Here's to all the bunnies in the world.

Tragedy

Something bad happened in Mayberry tonight.

Something bad, bad.

Something so horrible I'm trembling at the memory.

So here goes.

Don't read this if you have a weak stomach.

It started like any other Tuesday: Wake up, clean up, go to job #1, go to job #2 and finally dinner with the family.  Then I decided the yard needed mowed as I pulled in the driveway, so I fired up my new John Deere and went to it.

With the backyard complete, I moved to the front.  Sadly, however, a few minutes later I heard a high-pitched squeal that sent shivers down my spine as my eyes found the source: teeny, tiny baby rabbits no bigger than the palm of my hand.

Four of them scattered from the nest their mother had burrowed in the ground while one laid motionless (and leg-less) at the exact location of the accident. 

Panicked, a scream might have exited my mouth.

Looking up, I see my neighbor crossing the street with her toddler son and holler "I just ran over a bunch of rabbits!"  An animal lover herself, she hustled over to aid in my attempt to rescue the mini-rabbits.  Her cat takes off with one, another runs under my mower (don't worry, it's turned off), one is sitting stunned by the nest, and the last of the still-alive rabbits runs for my neighbor.

So we do what animal-loving girls do; we take the three we can catch (since the cat and mower took care of the other two) and put them in a box with some grass and such.

Thinking that will be the last of the rabbits for the night, a few minutes later my neighbor knocks at the door with the three rabbits and says she looked it up and we need to put them back in the nest and mark an "X" with some twigs because the momma rabbit comes back at night.

In the morning we'll know if momma rabbit learned of her misfortune of having two less mouths to feed.   In the meantime, I must cope with the fact that I'm a terrible, terrible person. 

Someone please explain to me how gutting a deer is wonderful to me, but this horrific incident is proving highly traumatic. 

You can tell a lot about a woman...

By her purse.  (And the contents of it)

Trust me.


For instance, take my younger sister.  In many ways, she's my polar opposite: quite, brunette, even-tempered, you get the idea.  Well, her purses are always whatever is in style.  Right now she's toting grey patent leather snakeskin with ruffles.  I have no idea if that's really what it is (but it is grey and ruffled), but it sounded good, right?  She's the kind of girl with tissues and gum wrappers, pencils and lotion littering the bottom of her handbag.

But like I said, we're polar opposites.

Cleaning out my own purse today was more like a magic show.  You know, the kind where the magician keeps pulling stuff out of the hat and you have no idea where it comes from.  Or this could be because my purse could double as a small suitcase.

There were no tissues.

No gum wrappers.

No pencils.

And definitely no lotion.

However, there were:

A pair of needle-nose pliers, crumpled gas receipts, a half-empty tube of lip gloss, a couple of .30-.30 shells, a backup Valentines Day card that was never delivered and now has a song written on the envelope, 31 pennies, dress tape, and a travel size Germ-X.

You may now form an opinion on my lack of tissues.

Tuesday's Gone

Disclaimer: This post has nothing to do with a Lynyrd Skynyrd song.

Have you ever wondered where on earth the time goes?

This morning, my alarm starts screaming at me at 5:03 and now here I am almost 17 hours later wondering what in the world I accomplished today.  There were no monumental tasks accomplished, no startling revelations made or even a really good joke told (wow, it was a lousy day!) yet this feeling of tiredness won't leave me alone. 

Wait, forget everything I just said: I failed to remember my hour of Pilates - that explains it all!


Moving on, I've compiled a list (because lists are fun) and have figured out the things I have completed in recent history that I am semi-proud of.

- My alternator went out on my truck, but have no fear because I double as a master mechanic every third Wednesday.  Ok, really I'm no mechanic at all.  Just a few sockets, a long handled flat head screwdriver, two wrenches and one fan belt later and voila... I took off my own alternator, took it to get repaired and stuck it back on Bubba Truck.  And if you're wondering, he's running like a champ.

- Speaking of Bubba Truck, he finally got a bath since Mayberry has had beautiful weather.  He stayed clean four and a half days! A RECORD!

- A few new recipes panned out quite nicely, including a variation of chocolate cupcakes, a cool twist on strawberry butter cream frosting (which was almost a catastrophe), and a cookie-like dessert that I haven't named yet.  Can you tell that I bake my feelings?  By the way, I have a lot of feelings.  That's both a blessing & a curse. 

- Did I mention I did Pilates?  Yes, I'm quite proud of that.  Now my abs hurt.  Rather, the abs under my belly flab hurt. 

- The carpet in my living room has been ripped up and discarded, thanks to the awesome strength and determination I (and my kid sister) have.  Now it's on to getting all those staples out of the floor from the carpet padding.

Yes, it's a short list, but one I'm proud of.  Maybe in the next few weeks I'll learn something really cool, like rewiring a house or designing computer software.

Oh, who am I kidding?!   I'll just mow the grass. 

A few weeks in pictures

Dadgummit!

It's been over a month since you've heard from me... why haven't I been shot yet?

Well, to say life has been busy is an understatement, so I'll fill you in on a few of the happenings of the last few weeks.

In no particular order:

My best friend got engaged (yay!) and I'm honored with holding her bouquet as she says "I do" to the boy who gives her pitter patterage.  Couldn't be happier for her!

In honor of her engagement, we were able to get together, along with her mom, both grandmothers, his mom, and his sister as we tried on wedding dresses for her nuptials coming up in July.  Due to keeping her dress a secret from her Beloved, I'll spare the details - but this dress is PERFECT!!

While in the process of finding the perfect dresses for the mothers and grandmothers, my friend and fellow bridesmaid, Haven, found humor in me trying on hats.  Apparently I have a head for them.  Or face.  Or something, I forget exactly.

Then while I was in town I stopped by to see a couple (or 24) other friends at one of the best Mexican restaurants in town.  Thanks to one of my friends, I made the waiter blush each time he looked at me the remainder of the evening.  Note to self:  Never ask the waiter what certain words mean in his native language.

Then we had a pretty big storm wipe through the area.  Tornadoes ran wild across several states, killing dozens of people and leaving entire towns in ruins after their destruction passed.  I snapped this picture on the way to get my alternator rebuilt, but that's another story.  Everybody else was ducking for cover and in all of my wisdom, I decided to travel across state lines for the sake of getting my truck up and running for weekend excursions. 

Hey, I only claimed to be entertaining, not a genius.

 

 

And finally, one of the reasons I love friends - they can just tell when you're having a bad day.... then they do something about it. 

Everybody needs friends like that. 

V-day traditions

This "holiday" has never meant much to me.

When I was younger it was just a day to see who could get the most candy.  As I made my way into high school, the girls carrying flowers into class made me kinda nauseous.  (Or maybe I was just jealous?)

It was my first Valentine's day that I actually was dating someone when I realized: this crap is for the birds.  Perhaps I got my hopes up too much and that's why every V-day since then I've cringed.  I've had guys give me gag gifts, used gift cards and nothing at all.  One, in fact, said he shouldn't buy me anything because he was my gift.  Say what?

Needless to say, my Valentine's tradition has become the following:  1- get home from work; 2- change into sweat pants; 3- pour a glass of bourbon; 4- watch my  favorite movie: "Gone With the Wind."

And yesterday morning, that was my intention.  I was living for quittin' time so I could trade my high heels for thick socks and my curled tresses for a ponytail.  But..... that didn't happen.

The current code name informed me that we were going to dinner, causing me to cringe.  When I told him my Valentine's tradition he laughed until he realized I was completely serious.

Sadly, though, he won.

Ok, I kinda enjoyed it.  Can't lie.

As it turns out....

The other day when I was talking about making a list of what I'd do if I had a month to live, I failed to realize that my preacher wanted that list to include 25 things.  Holy mackerel.

So here goes, in no particular order...


1.  Take a drive.  There's this place I go about an hour away from Mayberry that soothes my soul.  I stumbled upon it by accident a few years ago after a horribly horrid breakup and since then, it's the perfect place to drop off the face of the earth.  There is no cell phone coverage, nobody around there knows me, and I can just sit by myself to collect my thoughts.  Pretty dadgum perfect.

2.  Tell the nine most significant people in my life how much they have meant to me.  Although, I'm still undecided on whether or not I'd tell them about my definitive expiration date.  After all, once people know you won't be around much longer, they tend to throw you a pity fest and I don't want any part of that.

3.  Love God.   There are no words to describe my relationship with Him. It's a very personal and intimate thing which needs no explanation to the rest of the world.  My only hope is to serve Him while I'm on this earth to the best of my ability.  After all, it's by His grace that I'm here in the first place.

4.  Dance on my tailgate.   Sure, it sounds silly, but I suppose you'd have to know me pretty well to understand this one.  It would involve a bonfire, a cooler of Mt. Dew, a handful of friends and a stereo cranked up with my favorite music blaring.  If anything else, I want everybody to remember the way I was.

5.  Right my wrongs.  I'm not perfect - far from it, in fact.  I'm human, just like you.  I make mistakes and I've always had a knack for getting myself into sticky situations, some for the worse, some for the better.  Nevertheless, I must make amends.  I'd forgive an old friend who hurt my feelings,  no matter how intentional she was; ask forgiveness for a lie I told; and try to be a better role model for those around me.

6.  Bake, bake, bake.  It's like a therapy.  Strawberry cupcakes, oatmeal raisin cookies and red velvet cakes would be flying out of my kitchen.  Sorry if you gain any weight.

7.  Make a video for my nieces and nephew.  They are young, (and one isn't even born yet) and I'd like them to know how much I wish I could be there to see their dance recitals, graduations, birthdays, and soccer games.

8.  Drive to the big, big city on a Wednesday.  Go downtown in my absolute favorite city, act like a local and see if I could meet anyone whose life I might help.  You never know just where the people are who need you the most.

9.  Go shooting with the big guns.  Let's call in a few favors to a few friends and see how many rednecks I can beat at shooting skeet.  Ok, they'll beat me but I'm sure we'll have a good time.

10.  Read Revelation.  That book has always scared me, but it's high time I sit down and soak it up, word for word.  By now I'm probably getting pretty excited about seeing my dad again.

11.  Sing Karaoke all night.  I really don't care where and I don't care if anyone wants to join me, but I really, really just want to belt it without worrying if people even think its good.  Just hand me the dadgum microphone. 

Speaking of handing me a microphone,

12.  I'd have a radio show.  Well, maybe not, but I'd try my best.  It's probably one of the biggest passions in my life and I wish I were still doing it some days, but as any radio veteran will tell you, the pay is crummy.  Crummy pay doesn't get this girl out of her Momma's house.  BUMMER!

13.  But I REALLY love radio!!  Yes, that's a two-pointer.  Now someone hand me a microphone.

14.  Eat sushi, again and again.  Yes, I've had it before and quite possibly fell in love with a food I never imagined my taste buds would like.  Maybe I'm not as country as originally thought, or perhaps my liberal arts secondary education has succeeded in making me a well rounded individual.

15.  Spend hours with my grandmother talking about top secret information.  She is like a vault.  I'm scared to know who all's secrets she is keeping inside her, but she's so good at it.  I could talk to her for hours upon hours about everything from politics, to music, to weaning calves.  The woman is smart.  End of story.

16.  Record stories for my little sister and perhaps even nieces on dating and relationship advice.  I've never been great at either one of those things, so it would end up being a list of what not to do and what signs to run from.  (Hint, if he badmouths his momma, RUN!)

17.  One last roadtrip to the beach.  It doesn't have to be for an entire week, I just want to make memories with my family that they can treasure for the rest of their lives.  Oh, who am I kidding?! I just want to die with a tan on my pasty face since I don't have to worry about skin cancer by that point.

18.  Meet with the mortician.  As I've told you, I've known him my entire life and still haven't settled on a coffin.  And I'd also like to run over the game plan with him about various aspects of a funeral.  Yes, FUNERAL.  Not "celebration of life" like people are doing nowadays.  I'm old school like that.

19.  Find a good thunderstorm.  Who wants to join me and dance in a really good rain with the thunder rumbling and the sky acting like our own strobe light?  Especially if it was about 65 degrees.  That's worth getting my hair messed up.

20.  One last kiss.  I can't lie or pretend this one never crossed my mind, because it was actually closer to the top of the list. Lets catch a guy off guard and lay one on him.  I've wanted to but never had the guts, even though the opportunity has been there.  I only need an extra gargle of Listerine and the lucky guy.

21.  Write a few letters.  These would be for the kids in my Sunday School class.  Right now, they're fifth and sixth graders, but I'd write these for them to open when they go to high school.  It's a rough time on any teenager and I just want them to know that their church is there to help lead them down the right paths.

22.  Get a pedicure.  I'm going out with bright pink toes.  That's all I have to say about that.


23.  Drive a combine to work. Who wants to work?  This girl! Can't you just see my driving down a brick road in a new John Deere S690?  It could possibly make it in Mayberry's weekly newspaper and the thrice daily local news on the radio. 

However, after that stint, then I'd have to do this...

24.  Quit my job.  I just realized I forgot this one.  I wouldn't quit because I hate it (because I really do enjoy going to work in the mornings), rather, I'd leave so I'd have time to do all this stuff I want to do and spend time with the people I want to cherish.

How am I at the end already?

25. Spend a day on the river.  Borrow a friend's boat, back it in the water and have a good time.  Kinda like the tailgate party I mentioned earlier, but obviously without the bonfire and tailgate.  Or maybe we could go down to the lake and just take it easy as we go wherever the current takes us.


That wasn't awkward at all, right?

One month and a Bucket

What would you do if (for whatever reason) you had only one month to live?


Who would you spend your time with?  

What would you tell your best friends?
 
Where could people find you?

Would you finally make that apology you'd been putting off?

Would you tell people you loved them?

Could you forgive those who have wronged you? 


Would you embrace the time you did have or attempt to hide from your definitive mortality?


Last Sunday, my pastor began a sermon series based on the book "One Month to Live" by Kerry & Chris Shook.  He encouraged us to live life for the Lord with no regrets.  Don't say "oh, I'll go back to church when I get retire."  Leave the idea of your "busy life" behind because God never has been and never will be too busy for you. 

During the message, he challenged the congregation to make a list, a real, written list of what we would do if we had only one month to live.

A slight smile made its way across my face during the sermon because, for a brief moment, I felt almost normal.  The idea of death has been floating in my head for years, and as I've told you before, other people think it's weird.  (But if you ask me, I'm just prepared.)  It worries my mother and made my dad roll his eyes during his cancer treatments.  But all of the sudden I'm able to put on paper the things I would do.  A bucket list, so to speak. 

Now I'm sure this is where most people would want to skydive, mountain climb or take off on a cruise.  But if you haven't figured it out yet, I'm not most people.  Although I've never flown, the idea of soaring 35 thousand feet above the ground at 500 miles an hour scares me half to death.  If a situation ever arises that I MUST hop on a plane, you'll find me crouched in the corner sucking my thumb and rocking back and forth in a semi-comatose state.  As far as mountain climbing goes, I don't have the upper body strength or harness to take off up a mountain, and as for that cruise, 7 days stuck on a boat would leave me with sea sickness and three weeks instead of four. At least my math skills haven't failed yet.

*Disclaimer: for the record: I hope I don't perish anytime soon but if my time should come, you shouldn't worry about me and I'll see you on the other side.*

Now, on to the good stuff... A glimpse of what I would like to do should I have only one month to live.  (I reserve the right to change this as I see fit, which could be daily.)

First, I would try my best to right the many, many wrongs accumulated throughout the course of my relatively short-lived life.  I'd apologize to the ones I've let down along the way and give it my best attempt at making amends.  A couple of people wouldn't give me the time of day, but you can't blame a girl for trying.

I'd also want to try to convey to those closest to me just how much I care for them. That L-word and I don't exactly get along and I'm not sure why.  But my family and my best friends would have no doubt when it comes to the immense impact they have had on my life.  They make me want to be a better person whether or not they realize it.

In conjunction with this, I'd have to spend more time with my grandparents.  My grandfather is my Superman and due to his health, the family had to make the very hard decision of moving him into a rest home, so I don't see him every day like I do his wife.  He is full of funny stories from his childhood and life lessons he's learned the hard way.  Then there's my grandma.  To say she's my hero is a complete understatement.  Oh, and her cooking....MMMMM!!

Next, I'd have to have a little bit of fun with a little less seriousness.  It involves private property, off road vehicles and a little bit of dirt.  And in the words of Forrest Gump, "that's all I have to say about that."

And on a completely, possibly off the wall note (would you expect less from me?) I wanna drive a combine to work.  Can't you just see my driving down a brick road in a new John Deere S690?  It could possibly make it in Mayberry's weekly newspaper and the thrice daily local news on the radio.  Doesn't that sound like a blast?!

Apologizing, Rachel style.

Warning, bad word ahead.

Apologizing SUCKS.  If it were an activity on facebook, I wouldn't "like" it. 


Whew, glad I could get that off my chest.  What a bad post to start the new year off with, but I hoped maybe some of you have been in my predicament. 

You see, a friend of mine and I had a bit of a spat - at least I think that's what happened.  Maybe it was more of a misunderstanding or maybe my built up frustration was lashed out on the wrong person.  Yea, it was probably a combination of both previously mentioned scenarios.  

Basically, I have this horrible character flaw: admitting I'm wrong hardly ever happens.  My mother has often told me I get it from my father.

Thus, the problem: admitting to my friend that I overreacted to his poor attempt at humor and should never have said those horrible things or slammed his truck door so violently.   

Mental note: apologize to the Chevy. 

But back to my attempted apology.  I tried, really I did.  The speech was in my head and ready to be shared with the other party.  "Hey, remember the other day when I flipped out on you for being all those words I can't repeat on the internet?  Well, you were out of line but there is also a chance that I might have taken my disgruntlement a wee bit too far." 

Can you tell I've never been great at apologies?  It never reached the ears of the one meant for it, which is probably a blessing since I see how horrible it really is.  But why did it never reach the person intended?  Because I refuse to apologize via voicemail and a text message apology has no tone.  Perhaps he's mad at me too, which I kind of expected.  After all, he already apologized to me... twice, yet I couldn't do the same.  Hence, he doesn't answer the phone.

Maybe I'm old school, but that's just how I roll. So in the time I have before seeing him again, I have time to formulate the perfect apology.

There's no difference in formulating and Google-ing, right?  Good.